wrote a 'nuther

The things one thinks of in the shower...

why can't I stop thinking in poetry? 

In my english class we've been studying Dante's inferno (hilarious and creepy all at once)
so consequentially our teacher assigned us to create our own imaginary inferno- and my group chose Stupid Love Story Hell.
Seriously I love Rom-Coms but we can all admit that all the cliches, obsessive, and completely unrealistic-ness of them can get old and eye-roll worthy after a while...
So my group came up with 3 sins of stupid love stories and fitting contrapassos: Cliche Plot Devices/Situations, Obsessive Infatuation, and Irrational Decisions
journeyed through by Taylor Swift, our pilgrim, led by her Virgil, Beyonce set as happening during the VMAs.

Naturally, this being based on Dante, I haven't been able to get it out of my head and my mind's natural reaction has become poetry about anything school related.

WHY?!?!?!?!?!
SERIOUSLY THIS IS WEIRD.
but I mean whatevs I think my poem is hilarious....
see if you can find all the taylor swift songs I so cleverly wrote into the first and last few stanzas...
(I do apologize for the 1st few and last few stanzas..they're kinda shitty but the middle ones are funnier. I wrote the first and last ones in a rush to have for the class whereas the middle were the result of my sheer shower genius.)

One enchanted night I remember all too well

My eyes were opened when into hell I fell

Great help I came to realize I truly did need-

Beyonce knew all too well that I did indeed

"You are quite mislead by your fearless delight

With all loving things that happen in the starlight-"

I saw I needed saving from my own love story obsessed self

Even though it has won me awards for many a shelf.

As we descended down, or up- or is it around?

We came upon a famous two- he in white, she in blue

Known for their public display of love

That happened with the heavens crying up above.

Something about them, though, seemed queer

It was as though each other they could not get too near

Without all a manner of coughing and hacking

Which was quite disruptive to the beautiful kiss almost happening.

My gracious guide- that diva divine

Explained, for ears far more foppish than mine,

That they were forever locked in almost-embrace

But pneumoniac symptoms would arise as they came face to face.

We came to a place at the break of dawn

Where a pale couple- those with the halfbreed spawn

Glowered at each other from their tight-locked hold

Eyes seething- at times red, others quite gold.

"You idiot- you blinded me with the light of your skin

From the proximity to you I'm forever forced in"

Said she, whose gloom and doom

Had also begun to wear on he, whose bite was a half moon.

"Listen,"  spoke my Virgil, glorious Queen B

"For obsessive infatuation in the two here, you see,

Made their girths grow larger than large

And their faults- to which in life they had been so blind

Now stand out forever, sharper than needles of pine. "

Further up, down, around, or through-

Honestly the direction we went, I have no clue!

More surrounded were we by loveboats and arrows

Flowers, candy hearts, and many lovesick fellows.

We came to a garden with a balcony on high

And when I realized where, I nearly did cry

For the famous duo I knew were the Italians of lore

Who died, quite ironically, for their ardent amour.

"Honey, stop your sighing and pick up your jaw

For these two you see landed here because of their fatal flaw:

Past their love for each other and emotion they could not see

And jumped straight to conclusions- hastily destroying all their lives could be.

Now they are stuck without reason right here

Trying to complete a maze through which a child could steer.

For all their roses and moons, suns and verse

Nothing could be worse than this dumbfounding curse."

After this couple, I came to see

As clearly as if this was a movie,

That I needed to watch myself living out clichés

Being over-obsessive or irrationally dazed.

Then we climbed down and out

But landed right onstage in front of the crowd.

As soon as I left, I grabbed a pen

And let my songwriting career begin again.